Small Minded


Although I have been working in the area of nature conservation for the last 15 years, I was originally trained as a biochemist and later did my doctorate in microbiology. In retrospect, my doctorate has not been very useful to me. It doesn’t get me discounts at cinemas or restaurants, for example.

It also gets me no respect. When I tell people that I have a doctorate in microbiology, they usually respond by saying, “Oh, so you’re not a REAL doctor then”. Then, there is usually a short pause before they ask, “So what is a microbiologist anyway?”

I like to tell people that a microbiologist is someone who knows a lot about very little. Yes, I think that is a good definition. Anyway, as a service to young readers who may be trying to decide what to study at university or even for older readers seeking a career change, I have compiled the top ten reasons for doing microbiology. I hope this will help you.


1. Microbiologist practice safe sex – we always wear protection and use sterile technique.
2. We know how to give you fever.
3. Self-diagnosis saves time at at the doctor’s office.
4. We are really good at streaking.
5. We are used to different and diverse cultures.
6. Wanted to study to be a doctor but also wanted to party.
7. We know how to make small things look BIG.
8. The laboratory equipment can be used to make beer.
9. Get mistaken as doctors when wearing cute lab coats.
10. If we are really lucky, they will name a dreadful disease after us.



One thought on “Small Minded”

  1. SHOOOTTTTSSS…..what??? people don't know what is a microbiologist..duh.. I guess they are from the dinosaure age. Don't worry I know what it is since I was 10 years old. I still tell people my dear uncle is microbiologist and he use to make drinking water safe for you guys.Proud to have Dr. Lone G. Squirrel as my uncle..

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