My feet were close to perfect when I was newly born.  Two near perfectly formed, cute, pink feet.  It has been downhill since then.

Basketball accidents and a poorly executed Parkour move (an ill conceived jump down a flight of stairs) when I was a teenager resulted in weak ankles.  Badly fitting shoes led to deformed toenails.  I picked up a serious bunion on my right foot from a month of tramping  and backpacking across Europe one summer.  Scoliosis caused me to develop flat feet over time.  A combination of more bad shoes and years of working in wet and dirty environments gave me calluses, thick and cracked soles and the occasional bout of Athelete’s foot (which is a strange ailment to have for a non-atheletic couch potato).

My poor abused feet was looking pretty bad of late.  So bad in fact that my wife put her foot down and marched my resisting butt off to have a pedicure done at the local saloon.  And so, the Lone Grey Squirrel slides further down the slippery slope towards metrosexuality …..pushed along by his wife.  But to be honest, the experience was not as bad or as awkward as I had feared.  It was actually quite pleasant and my feet hasn’t looked or felt  so good in years.  But the look on the pedicurist’s face when she was first confronted with my “50 years of abuse” feet was very entertaining.  The poor thing……I left a big tip.

My Baby Feet
My Baby Feet
My feet after 50 years
My feet after 50 years

25 thoughts on “Feet”

  1. Oh, Mister Squirrel, the massage is the BEST part of that pedicure. 🙂 (I have found that moisturizing the feet daily makes a big difference to how bad they get.) Congrats to your wife for her influence.

  2. So the wife booted your feet to the land of toe. The mythical place of learning what women really think. Do you feel prettier now?

  3. My daughter and I had to laugh….after 8+ hour travel time to get to the Schiphol airport (AKA Amsterdam) and see a spa with a fishtank and minnow sized fish in it…..ITS true that’s what those nibblers are for…cleaning your feet.. Try it next time!

  4. LisaR,
    Socks? I have long given up using socks on my feet. Instead, I put buttons for eyes and use them as hand puppets. Say, I went over to your blog and enjoyed reading your posts very much. You seem like a nice Nutter and I love nuts.

  5. Anne,
    I have seen those little fishies as you have described but so far have not tried to play the role of fish food. Ummm…..you first? Thanks for visiting and don’t be a stranger.

  6. So glad your wife put her foot down. You need a good base to stay standing. Now that I said that I have to admit that I can’t stand anybody touching my feet. I hate it when my doctor touches mine and I have to tell him which toe he touched or if sharp or blunt. Take care.

  7. Oh I’ve got a weakness for little baby feet. Not for your squirrel feet though although the black nail polish looks good Good that things are on the improve with your pedicure.

  8. Fear of the embarrassment at seeing the look on the poor pedicurist’s face caused by my flat ugly feet has kept me from doing the same. But oh, a good foot massage sure would feel great.

  9. Ha, I had just discussed how I find feet in general to be ugly, and I keep mine hidden at all times. Needless to say, a pedicurist would faint at the sight of mine.

    If it isn’t too metrosexual of me to say so, I do admire your squirrel feet, though….

  10. Kat,
    John, run, John run before Kat gives you the metrosexual makeover! Run! Oh, wait…..too late. It’s hard to run when your feet are soaking in a hot water foot bath. 🙂 Carry on Kat.

  11. evilsquirrel13,
    Just because you are evil (and I am mad as in a mad scientist) doesn’t mean that you can’t have nice feet. Do not fear the pedicurist. We all can have nice feet …..even Hobbits!!!

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