Category Archives: humor

Odd


Dear gentle readers, I thought I would shake things up around here and challenge you to a competition to “spot the odd one out” or “the one that is different from the rest”.  I’m sure you know how to play but be warned, it gets harder as it goes.

not same 2
Photo 1: Easy Start
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Photo 2: Life imitating art
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Photo 3: Easy Riders
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Photo 4: Did you get this right?
not same 1
Photo 5: Camouflage
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Photo 6: This one is designed to give you eye strain.
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Photo 7 : And finally……this one is just really, really ODD!

The Lone Grey Squirrel would like to thank my fellow animal genius, the boredpanda for the photos above.

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Beyond Road Kill


Hi guys and gals.  Sorry I have been missing from the blogosphere for about two weeks.  In case, you were wondering what had happened to your favorite rabid grey squirrel, well, I’ll tell you.   I was ROADKILL.

Well, at least my also greying iMac was.  Below is a before and after photo.

squirrel thor
BEFORE: My Usual Screensaver
apple tire tracks
AFTER:  My Computer is Roadkill

One moment, I was considering how wonderful I look as Thor the Squirrel-God of Thunder and the next……….roadkill!

(Don’t those lines look like tyre threads?)

What followed were a few trips to various repair centres while carrying my elegant, sleek, silver and @#$&%@# darn heavy computer.  Then there was the anxious wait.  Will it survive?  Fortunately, all is now well.  Even my grand-niece, Ari, helped by invoking the healing power of the Lego Squirrel!

Ari squirrel
Ari: “By the power of GreySquirrel – Live Squirrel Live!”

Now ain’t she a cutie?

Dirty Job


You know, I was not always the handsome, debonair, upwardly mobile, world dictator wannabe.  Oh no.  Like everyone else, I had to start from the bottom and let’s face it, your bottom and my bottom may not be the same!

Errr…..what I mean is that some lucky sods start at the bottom of the pile but I had the fate of starting even further below that …….underground, so to speak.

My first job could be described as that of a “fecal surveillance hydrologist technician”.  But of course, I never heard anyone refer to me as that despite all the fancy name cards I handed out with that title proudly emblazoned.

No.  Instead I was kind of known as the Sewage guy or worse, the Shit Guy.  (…Cable Guy doesn’t seem so bad now, does it?).   You see, my job was to develop tests and to use them to detect the presence of water borne, disease causing pathogens in drinking water and since most of the nasties originate from the feces or shit of infected people, I was really looking out for traces of shit.

Yup, that was my job.  It involved taking water samples from all sort of water sources.  At the clean end, I collected tap water from a city distribution system.  But I also collected water samples in bottles from clear mountain streams,  less clear rivers, deep wells, aquifer pumps, shallow wells, muddy holes in the ground and at the other end of the spectrum, from sewage ponds.

In fact, I remember that my boss had a framed photo of himself in his office proudly showing him squatting next to a stinky sewage pond and reaching out to get a sample of dark, suspicious looking water.  I, on the other hand have burned all such photos of me doing that.  I have also over the years had to burn or bury many of my stinky work clothes!  Needless to say, my social life in those dark times was zilch.

But on a serious note, waterborne disease are estimated to affect billions and kill about 2.2 million annually.  In many countries,  clean treated potable water is still a privilege rather than the norm.  It is in these countries, that the need for simple, quick, portable  and cheap tests for monitoring water quality remains high.

To summarise, finding shit in drinking water……bad.  Doing something to remove the shit in drinking water ……..good.

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LGS is still testing water for your safety.

What was your “start at the bottom of the pile” job?

Alt Bohemian Rhapsody (Fake Song)


Now, despite my views of Mr. Trump, I have been keeping relatively silent about the going-ons in the White House for the last 6 months.  One, because there is already too much coverage on it in the media and on the internet and two, out of respect for those who still support the man.  I may disagree with your views but I felt it would be wrong to deride or ridicule them.

And then, I came across this wonderful gem below on the internet which touched on the recent short 10 day term of Anthony Scaramucci as Trump’s Communications Director and other current news.  It has been reposted so I don’t even know its original source but I thought it was really creative and funny.  So forgive the squirrel for this lapse in said principles above.  But this deserves to be celebrated.  Mago, I think you would particularly enjoy this.

Try singing it to the tune of Queen’s Bohemian Rhapsody and have fun.

Scaramucci rhapsody

I’m Back


Hi everyone.  I’m back.

I hid in my secret underground hideout, hibernating for the last four months, just so as to give you some time to sort things out but now that I have popped my head out, what do I see? I see that the Twitter-in-chief is still President of the USA.

But it wasn’t just fear that had made me keep a low profile.  To be honest, I was feeling a bit dry; like I was running out of things I wanted to say.  But I decided to give it a try again.  I hope you will be patient with me cause I’m not sure where I’ll be heading with this.  Baby steps. One post at a time.

To celebrate my coming back to the blogosphere, – like a bad penny that keeps turning up or a Hollywood sequel or reboot that we didn’t need like “The Mummy”, and also to belatedly salute my favorite country’s 150th Birthday, please enjoy this Canadian award winning gem.

(squirrel tattoo image from tattooimages.biz)

Well, I’ll be……


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A joyous announcement to the big, wide world,

Celebrating the birth of a bouncing baby girl,

My niece made her debut  on the 26th of January

Two days shy of the Rooster and still a Monkey

Her beautiful name is Sofia but pronounced Safia

So wonderfully appropriate, like the “sa” in sapphire

Shining brightly of joy, love and hope realised

Know that  you are now and forever cherished

And while in your mother’s arms you snuggle,

I suddenly realised that I’m a Monkey’s uncle!

Dearest Sofia,

As you get to know me, you’ll get to appreciate my off kilter humor…… I hope.

Love,

Uncle ‘Tiger’ Squirrel

For the Technologically Impaired


A friend of mine in Singapore has been involved in an initiative to reach out to senior citizens and improve their quality of life by educating them to the joys of computing and the internet.  This helps to keep them alert and engaged and some even go on to help charities and social programs using their newly learned skills.  A worthy effort.

One obstacle amongst the seniors is an inherent fear of technology and bewilderment brought on by unfamiliarity with the rapidly changing technology and technological jargon.

I confess that I too feel that I am falling behind the technological curve and in the danger of being left behind.  So as a public service, the Lone Grey Squirrel, wishes to share this informative video designed to be able to communicate at the level of senior citizens.